Before the advent of hardcore pornography, gay porn stars, and even gay rights, back in the days when homosexuality was considered both a crime and a psychological problem and the Post Office could bust you for sending naked pictures through the mail, the gay underground bubbled with softcore male loops made available to Collectors Only. These innocent, surprisingly silly, and often charming short films featured models either clad in posing straps or fully naked, but never, ever in sexual situations except to… well… wrestle each other. The loops were, in fact, the male equivalent of Nudie-Cuties. Eventually, when theaters catering to a gay clientele first started popping up in big cities with pre-hardcore fare, softcore loops were often offered as part of the program. In fact, more than one of those theaters advertised them, rather incongruously, as “All-Male Beavers.”
So travel back with Something Weird to a twilight era where anonymous men posed, pranced, paraded, pouted and, yes, even played pool in the nude courtesy of these rare all-nude 16mm time capsules from the late 1960’s….
- See: three stark-nekkid young men romp around a pool table, chasing each other and occasionally even clumsily making a shot, as the camera zooms in on their butts. What makes it so especially memorable is that one of the men is a tattooed goon wearing a giant – and we mean giant – afro wig while behaving like a Neanderthal. No, we don’t know what to make of it either but, hey, this is still the best film about the game of pool ever made!
- See: a James Spader look-alike in a black t-shirt and leather pants pose with a limp dick protruding from his fly. He finally gets completely naked only to dance in place and look remarkably foolish!
- See: a young man with a rather serious expression remove his clothes and lie fidgeting on a yellow bed, happy to share his privates with the world!
- See: a pudgy lunkhead get nekkid and writhe around on a bed as if he had a stomach ache, proving once again that not everyone should be photographed naked. Make him stop, make him stop!
- See: a lonesome cowboy climb high atop a rock in the middle of nowhere and, with no one around, take off his clothes, adjust the Ace bandage around his knee, exercise, and look into the barrel of his gun!
- See: a slim young man with newly-shaved privates balance a pillow on his head!
- See: a furry-chested fellow bump and grind on his sofa!
- See: an even more hirsute leather man drop his drawers and pose on a ladder while showing us all how much fun handcuffs can be!
- See: cowboys and Indians shoot cans off a rock without wearing any clothes!
- See: a desert dance party featuring two naked men playing ukuleles!
- See: our favorite idea for a party as three nekkid young men stumble around a room with blindfolds on until they all fall onto the floor and stumble around each other!
- And, of course, more! In fact, this is the perfect entertainment for your next gay soiree!
- -- Dwight Pangborn